Patriots Pull a Seventh-Grade Move with Brandon Aiyuk
This reminds me of seventh grade when I heard my girlfriend was planning to dump me during lunch, so I dumped her first. Big win for me.
The Patriots just did something similar with Brandon Aiyuk. They’ve been chasing him all offseason, even tried to trade for him before the draft by offering the 34th pick to the 49ers, but Aiyuk rejected it. He refused to sign an extension with New England, for obvious reasons – they’re the worst team in football.
This week, the Patriots tried again and failed. Aiyuk still wasn’t interested. So now they’re saying they don’t want Aiyuk anymore. Slick move. “After inquiring about Brandon Aiyuk’s availability, the Patriots have decided not to explore any further trade possibilities with the 49ers regarding their standout wide receiver,” tweeted ESPN’s Adam Schefter. “Patriots are excited about their young receivers and want to focus on them.”
Translation: The Patriots aren’t really excited about their young receivers. They wanted Aiyuk, but he didn’t want them.
Just like I wanted my seventh-grade girlfriend, but she didn’t want me. So I dumped her first to save face. Although privately, I cried myself to sleep for a week. I expect Aiyuk will eventually end up with the Steelers, just like my seventh-grade girlfriend eventually ended up with someone much cooler than me. It’s inevitable.